krystalkatzfics | Why Not Me? (Part 5)

Title: Why Not Me?

Author: krystalkatz
Rating: PG
Length: chaptered
Genre: Au, Angst,

Pairings: Matsumoto Jun/Ninomiya Kazunari, , Matsumoto Jun /Aiba Masaki (Broken),Ohno Satoshi/Ninomiya Kazunari

Disclaimer: I only own the plot

A/N: Written for anakorangutanwho kindly donated for the help_pilipinas auction I hope you like it :)

Present day

Nino took a breath before pushing open the door of the apartment, Aiba had asked him to got to Matsu’s apartment and collect his things and give back his key. He could have said ‘no, do it yourself’ but a small part of him wanted to see Matsu to make sure that he was okay.

He had only ever been to Matsu’s apartment once before for a party he had spent as much time as he could away from Matsu and Aiba. Spending most of the night being rimmed by some actor ‘wanna be’ in the bathroom.

He knew he was a slut, he had been, and he could blame it on a lot of things… Like, he came from broken home or a deep lack of self-worth. But deep down the answer was simple he liked to fuck and be fucked. As long as everyone was enjoying themselves it didn’t matter. At least it had been that way before Matsu.

When he had been dating Aiba he would always give him the most disgusted looks, like he was a cockroach or worse. When other people that looked at him that way he would just ignore it or was a lot ruder back but when Matsu looked at him like that he had almost exploded in anger.

Most of their knowing each other had been volatile each dropping snipping comments at each other but there were sometimes that Matsu could be really sweet to him. Like his birthday. Nino smiled at the memory for a moment and then jumped as he heard a muffled curse and then a door opening.

Nino’s heart thumped as he saw Matsu stumbling around very obviously drunk, in fact he still had a bottle in his hand though most of the liquid seemed to be spilling onto the floor now.

“Matsumoto-san?” Nino whispered slowly, terrified that the idol was going to fall head first into the glass table or something. Matsu turned to stare at him, trying to focus blood shot dilated eyes in his direction.

“What are you doing here?” He slurred stumbling towards him. Nino almost cringed as he looked at him. His hair was a bird’s nest on his head and his clothes were the same ones he had seen him in the club two days ago

“Ma-Masa… He sent me to fetch his stuff” Nino said

“I don’t know where it is” Matsu said his arm flaying around the drink from the bottle going everywhere.

“For fucks sake” Nino swore, marching forwards he grabbed the bottle from his hand and threw it down, promising himself that he would clean it up later “Wow, you stink, when was the last time you had a bath?”

“What’s it to you?”

“Nothing but I can just imagine all of your little fan girls crying if they ever saw you like this” Nino grumbled praying that his fake self-confidence wouldn’t fail him now. He all but physically dragged the protesting Matsu into the bathroom and pulled his clothes off.

Nino ran his eyes over the body that he had been picturing naked for over a year and even the though he sweaty and clammy it was still far better than anything he had ever imagined “God, you’re disgusting” he bit out letting him go before he did something utterly stupid.

“I’m disgusting?” Matsu repeated and Nino knew if the idol was sober he would have given him a seething comment instead he just sank down onto the toilet seat while Nino ran him a bath.

“Yep, completely disgusting, how can you get into a state like this over one guy?”

“No…None…” Matsu managed and Nino finished the sentence for him in his own head ‘None of your business brat’. Well he was the one that had found him so this was his business he told himself.

“What about work?” Nino asked testing the water with his elbow not wanting to scold Matsu on top of everything else

“Phoned… Poorly”

“Wow, such a girl… One broken heart and it’s the end of the world…” Nino mumbled grabbing him by the arms and guiding him to the bath wanting desperately to ignore the beautiful thing that was dangling in front of his eyes as he helped him in to the bath.

“You don’t… Have a heart so… No understand” Matsu said almost slipping in the water until Nino caught him and helped him sit down

“If having a heart means I end up as pathetic as you I’m glad I got rid of that sucker” Nino mumbled, trying to ignore the stabbing pains in his heart. He grabbed the soap with one hand still supporting Matsu with the other.

He scrubbed him gently trying not to let his hands linger for too long, in case the idol decided when he was sober that Nino had taken advantage of him.

“Why… Are y-you doing this?” Matsu asked and Nino’s heart leapt when he saw how close they were

“Don’t tell anyone, but you’re my good deed for the year” Nino shrugged quickly grabbing a jug from the side and pouring it over his head so Matsu wouldn’t see his blush. The idol spluttered for a bit and Nino tried not to laugh as he took some expensive shampoo and applied it to his hair.

“Feels nice…” Matsu sighed happily as Nino started working the soap up into his hair.

“You like other people touching your hair?” Nino asked slightly scrapping his nails over his head. Matsu nodded happily. Nino pretty much massaged his head until Matsu was almost moaning in pleasure. Nino had to shift himself a few times to hide the problem he was starting to have.

“Slee-py” Matsu mumbled

“Not yet… You have to get dry first… Or you’ll catch a cold” Nino said letting the water out and grabbing a towel. Matsu swayed slightly as Nino helped him to his feet and out of the bath.

He supported his weight guiding him to the living room, he pushed him down on to the sofa and quickly rubbed him dry. Matsu was already falling to sleep when he had finished. With a sigh he pushed him down onto the sofa and tried to find a blanket or something to cover him.

He went into a bedroom and pulled one off bed going back to Matsu he grinned when he saw him fast asleep the towel just barely covering his body. Nino wrapped the blanket tightly around him and then set about to tidy the apartment or at least clear some of the bottles.

It took him about an hour to clear up the kitchen and living room, trying to make as little noise as possible around Matsu. When he finished he grabbed one of the unopened bottles from the fridge and sank into a chair thinking that he should leave but wanting to make sure that Matsu would be okay when he woke up.

He had drained the first bottle and had just started on a second when Matsu finally opened his eyes. The idol blinked startled for a moment and then sat upright holding the blanket over himself.

“You? What are you doing you doing here?” He asked “And why am I naked? Oh crap we didn’t do it did we?”

“As if I’d do you…” Nino snapped thinking ‘so I guess we’re back to normal’ with a sinking heart “You completely plastered when I came round to fetch Masaki’s stuff… Jeez, you were only together a few months…”

“You wouldn’t understand”

“You said that before” Nino said draining the bottle “Well you were wrong then and you’re wrong now…I love Masa, like a brother and I would do anything for him but the truth is even without knowing it our whole lives he’s taken everything I’ve ever wanted” Nino muttered knowing that tomorrow he would be blaming the almost non-existent alcohol in his system for the things he was saying “And that includes you…”

“Me what does this have to do me…?”

“You’re such an idiot” Nino mumbled and the pulled Matsu into a kiss, it was brief but enough to send bolts of lightning over his body as he tasted the vodka the taller guy had been drinking.

Matsu pushed him away rubbing his lips, the action cutting painfully into Nino’s heart “I was in love with you first, before Masa even saw you… Why not me? Why couldn’t it have been me?” He asked before getting to his feet shakily and running out of the apartment almost blinded by his tears. By some blessing from the gods he made it out of the apartment building before falling into a heap hating himself for being so weak and crying over it, for betraying his friend but most of all loving Matsumoto Jun.

TBC

A/N: Next chapters are the past in Matsu’s POV, I hope you enjoy ^.^